looking, seeing and becoming real

Mutt and i look at each other alot, but he looks at me the most. i can't tell you how many times i look over from the drivers seat, and see him gazing at me. nothing makes me "present" much more than this. it's like a little electric shock goes through me. there is nothing like opening my eyes in the morning, and seeing his dark brown eyes staring patiently down at me. 


i have vague recollections of reading somewhere about pack, and dominance, and staring.  i don't remember exactly, but i think it said that a dog staring you down is trying to dominate. that you should stare back at them till they look away. i don't know about this, maybe some of the more dog-savvy can weigh in. all i know, is that Mutt and i spend an awful lot of time looking at each other, and i don't have any sense of "winning" or even of competition.  all i know is that we see each other.


i wrote a blog about one of my experiences, about seeing someone and being seen by them. take a moment today, not just to look at someone, but to see them:


http://twokniveskatie.blogspot.com/2009/02/out-of-sorts.html

my best friend. ever.

 he seriously sleeps like this sometimes. there is a story about plucky duck. it's sad though. another time, maybe.

 halloween. cleopatra, if you didn't guess. no matter, the humiliation is the same.

 he loves the van. it is his real home. sometimes when i don't know where he is, i will find him sitting next to it, just waiting.

Mutt is so patient, so zen. he asks for so little, and gives everything. i posted once before about him, just waiting:


http://twokniveskatie.blogspot.com/2009/02/waiting-for-mike.html


and here:


http://twokniveskatie.blogspot.com/2009/02/waiting-for-brakes_27.html

and for those who missed it, here is how i lucked into the best dog in the whole wide world:


http://twokniveskatie.blogspot.com/2008/03/snownose.html

fiber goody giveaway and a chance to help

saw this on facebook (thanks DeAnna!) and wanted to share it with everyone.

Pete's Greens, an organic CSA in vermont, suffered a devastating fire recently. Juniper Moon Farm is having a giveaway in an attempt to help. you can enter the giveaway whether you donate or not, but every dollar will help this guy get back on his feet before the growing season! they have raised over $5,000 already. check it out here:

Juniper Moon Farm Giveaway

they are giving away an enormous amount of cool stuff, from books, yarns, fibers.....and again, you do NOT have to donate to enter.

kudos to Juniper Moon Farm for their huge hearts!

great blog post on the Rubber Tramp Rendezvous

great blog post over at "RVly ever after" about the RTR. so sad i missed it! check it out:

http://rvlyeverafter.blogspot.com/2011/01/rubber-tramp-rendezvous-quartzsite-az_29.html?showComment=1296408519891#c8579735365047561120

the value of empty

i get a daily meditation from the tao te ching. todays was especially meaningful because it speaks to me on so many levels.

"Thirty spokes are joined together in a wheel,
but it is the center hole
that allows the wheel to function.

We mold clay into a pot,
but it is the emptiness inside
that makes the vessel useful.

We fashion wood for a house,
but it is the emptiness inside
that makes it livable.

We work with the substantial,
but the emptiness is what we use."

when i first read this, i thought of my van. on my first couple cross-country trips, i was proud of how much i could fit in all the nooks and crannies, and how many valuable, useful things i could haul along while remaining organized. on my last trip, though, i began to realize the value of emptiness.....of useable space. for many of us, downsizing is an ongoing project, a renewable goal. 

the last few months have been a downsizing in many other ways. i have been doing things more mindfully and with greater focus than i am usually capable of.   it is very hard for me, slowing down the inner turmoil and the cacophony of thoughts tumbling around in my head. even when those thoughts are positive or cheerful, as they often are, the are tiring. my mind does not always feel like my own..... it is crowded and busy and all to often self-absorbed. i said to a friend not long ago "i will really attain minimalism when i can downsize my brain".

i thought of that statement again after re-reading the above meditation a few times. "we work with the substantial but the emptiness is what we use". it hit me this evening how meaningful that is to me.  i don't think i have come close to understanding it....if anything, i don't want to overthink it, and miss the whole point. for now, i'm just going to let it be what it is.

i've been really scarce on the internet lately, been on a kind of digital diet. i have been practicing slow-down kind of things (i am reluctant to use the word "meditation" in the same blog post that references my thought processes!) and i have been having some success which delights me no end. i have fallen in love all over again with knitting and have taken up colorwork which involves counting and following charts.....mindful and purposeful and satisfying.  i am appreciating simple things in a way i haven't in a long time. i am grateful for the snippets of stillness that i stumble over, when i least expect it, and i have no doubt that there will be more........

new vandweller forum

wanted to get the word out about the new vandweller forum over at Bob Wells'  "cheaprvliving" website.

so many of us have gotten our start, or benefited from Bob's website in some way. there is a ton of information there, and now a new forum where we can ask questions, share our stories, and glean information on the mobile lifestyle. please come join us, we will be glad to have you!

http://www.cheaprvlivingforum.com/